A Self-Practice for Difficult Times
By: Feeltone Trainer Joule L'Adara
During the worst days of the Coronavirus outbreak when around 1000 people per day were perishing of Covid-19 in the small geographic area around me in NYC, I needed a practice I could use that would meet me in the heightened state of that moment. I needed to shake, wail, moan, make crazy sounds, run around my apartment, roll on the ground, cry, howl. Only if I did that for a good 5 minutes at full intensitiy until I utterly exhausted myself, could I then start to make more soothing sounds to comfort my nervous system. Another five more minutes of sounding, I could finally handle sitting in a mediation in stillness. I'd expressed what I'd been collecting inside me since the last time I practiced. I'd emptied out. And now there was open space within to be with the stillness.
Later, I realized I could bring the monochord into this practice. In my daily self-care monochord practice, I first need to express my pent-up stuff on the instrument. I play it robustly! (She can handle it!) I make grand sweeping gestures up and down the strings, I bang across the surface with the palms of my hands, I use my thumbs, claw at the instrument with my fingernails, and make all kinds of crazy sounds with my voice and breath. It's super cathartic! It draws the excess energy I have from all the angst, fear, anger, trauma, and the unnamable emotions... transforming it into something epic, explosive, and even at moments: surprisingly joyful...